You have just accepted an invitation to your first Italian wedding and you are now wondering what to gift the sposi (bride and groom)? Read on for some valuable advice.
The degree of acquaintance with the spouses and the budget at our disposal are elements to take into account. Usually the closer you are to them, as friends or close relatives, the more important and heartfelt the gift is.
La lista di nozze (the wedding gift list) is a tradition that is consolidating more and more among young spouses. In fact, precisely young people prefer this form of gift to the more traditional “envelope”. Creating a wedding list has countless advantages for everyone. First, for the couple who do not risk having an unwelcome gift delivered to them and, secondly, for the guests who can choose the gift according to their financial resources and their personal tastes.
A wedding gift list would be available at a large store or travel agency.
How does it work?
Step 1, the bride and groom choose the wedding list. They go to their trusted shop (lately, home furnishing shops are slowly replacing travel agencies), choose a series of products they wish to receive as a gift, duly informing the guests (perhaps with a footnote on the invitation or partecipazione di matrimonio) on the existence of a wedding list.
Step 2, the guests go to the shop where the wedding list was opened and pay their share (if the gift is substantial or if, the bride and groom decide to receive a honey moon trip, viaggio di nozze, as a gift), or they pay the entire share of the present they choose on the list. After the ceremony, the newlyweds collect the gifts purchased by the guests from the shop.
If no wedding gift list is available, you will have to trust your judgment especially when the spouses already have everything, if you do not really know them well. Here are a few ideas.
Fancy electro domestics and design kitchen gadgets are popular but if you are not exactly sure which appliance to buy, it is a good rule to ask for confirmation from those directly involved to avoid filling precious counter space.
Gifting an experience is also a good option. Smartboxes are essentially packages that include one or more days or experiences that the recipients can book in the many affiliated facilities, during the dates they prefer.
It would be better to refrain from giving jewellery, books, large pieces of furniture and – above all – pets.
If you decide to give money, bear in mind that the gift should at least equal the value of the money you would imagine would be spent per head by the family on the wedding reception. Typically a minimum of 100-120 € if the guest is an acquaintance. The figure rises to around 150 € in the case of friendship or work relationship with the bride or groom.
Traditions
In some traditional Italian weddings, brides carry la borsa — or a satin bag — during the reception, and guests place envelopes of cash in it if they want a dance with the bride or to help the newlyweds with future arrangements such as a house or vacation.
In another tradition, bits of the bridegroom’s tie is sold off, amidst much hilarity, to the wedding guests for money.
